I've discovered I have the ability to tell which child is causing trouble without looking up now...YES! This is a talent that always spooked the hell out of me as a student. I'd pass a note to my friend via the clip on a pen or inside a pencil sharpener and ol' Eagle Eyes at the front of the room would automatically know I was up to no good--even though she was facing the chalkboard (this was the olden days before whiteboards and TV and civilization you know).

After perplexing my class with this new-found talent, we moved on to the actual study of geometry. The only word that comes to mind when I hear geometry is ICK. Even after 10 years, I remember Mr Von Handorf and the horror of proofs. So far I'm successful in tricking my kids into believing I know what I'm doing, but I'm one QED away from losing all authority on the matter. I could probably let one of my students teach from my magical book of answers and things would go swimmingly.

Question of the day: When did cave men start being racist to women?

I tripped over that one (especially with the principal sitting in our room these days).

Umm...first of all, I think you mean sexist...you know, cuz it's based on...gender...and what we think of as sexist was probably a normal way of life for them. Cuz, farmers needed hands and what is the best form of labour for a farm? No, not paying people...kids, people, kids! Women were busy raising babies and um, making food and stuff...MOVING ON, specialization of labour (hoo boy).

Yeah. I did tell ten year olds farmers procreate for the purpose of slave labour. In front of my boss. Well done, me. With any luck he's focused more on his Christmas shopping than my inept teaching.

I need another break to recover from Thanksgiving. Think they'll notice if I just don't come in for a few days?